• So Why the Blog Title?

Gay and Evangelical

~ Mutually Exclusive?

Gay and Evangelical

Tag Archives: homosexuality

Jesus Likes Me, This I Know

22 Friday Jan 2021

Posted by David L. Gill in Christianity, Personal, Theology

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

C. S. Lewis, community, friendship, greatest commandment, homosexuality, Jesus, sexuality

Hey all…I know it’s been a while. Lots of COVID-related emotional down-ness (I’m a hyer-extrovert) and working on projects when I’m able (I’m scoring a silent film from 1925 at present), so I’m trying to keep busy. I’ll do a full personal update soon.

Someone recently asked me what I would tell my 16 year old self knowing what I know now. Here’s what I answered, edited for clarity (I hope):

Yes, I know this is a deep cut. If you get it, you get it.
  • That Jesus loves and LIKES him.
  • That at 38, he has more friends than he can imagine
  • That his sexuality is a precious gift and is a reason he has so many friends

Someone else asked me to talk more about the first point, so this is what I wrote:

Continue reading →

National Coming Out Day, 2020

11 Sunday Oct 2020

Posted by David L. Gill in Christianity, Personal

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

coming out, homosexuality, Revoice, sexuality, worship

I grew up in a home where anything related to coming out was met with a sneer. “Why do they have to force their sexual depravity on us?” was a common refrain in discussions. From the time that I began actually dealing with the fact that my sexual attractions and my experience of the world just didn’t fit the narrative which my friends and relatives seemed all-too-comfortable in, I weighed the options of coming out.

For years, I refused. My freshman year of college, I was asked point-blank by a friend in marching band: “Are you gay?” I told him no. I had reasons, of course. Being a conservative Christian, I reasoned that I wasn’t actually gay because I wasn’t sleeping with men. I was same-sex attracted and was attempting to be free from the curse thereof through prayer, accountability, and just plain perseverance.

There is nothing at all wrong with any of those three things. It was, for me, a misguided attempt to grapple with reality as I found it.

But was he asking about my sexual practices? No, probably not right then. He was likely only asking if I liked dudes. And so, I was lying. He probably doesn’t even remember the conversation, but that lie has weighed on me much more heavily than the lies I later told my parents.

Continue reading →

Gay Celibacy and Relational Capital

27 Tuesday Aug 2019

Posted by David L. Gill in Christianity, Personal, Theology

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

celibacy, gay, holiness, homosexuality, shame, theology

I have a public service announcement for all the celigaybies* out there:

I suspect that at least some of my readers wrestle with how to keep their families and manage those family members’ expectations of them. I suspect also that there are many for whom the reasons they choose celibacy are cloudy sometimes. I resonate with that very deeply; I’m simply trying to turn on some fans to disperse the smoke so that others might see clearly.

Continue reading →

A Fulfilled Life

29 Saturday Jun 2019

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

celibacy, ethics, homosexuality, love

“The task we have to face is the same, whether we are married or single: To live a fulfilled life in spite of many unfulfilled desires.” —Walter Trobisch

Recently, I finished reading the book Loves Me, Loves Me Not: The Ethics of Unrequited Love, by Dr. Laura A. Smit (Baker, 2005). She is giving me a lot to chew on as I think about my own journey of crushes, love, loss, and friendship.

One section which stands out to me addresses whether to tell someone you love them. Dr. Smit says:

Continue reading →

Gay Exhaustion

01 Friday Feb 2019

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Church, exhaustion, gay, Gay Christians, homosexuality

Folks often ask me how I’m doing. It’s a safe way of starting a conversation that won’t stall out in small talk about the weather or degenerate into a shouting match about politics.

More often than not, I tell people that I’m tired. There are multiple reasons I’m tired these days. Anxiety causes sleep to be inferior. Also, anyone with as many friendships as I find myself having has a lot of relational strain to deal with because people are people and I’m me. If you know me in person and we haven’t had it out yet, relax. We will.

The type of tired I’m thinking about today is “gay exhaustion.” This is something I find working in tandem with all the other anxiety in my life. Here’s what I think it looks like:

Continue reading →

Gay Respectability

24 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by David L. Gill in Politics, Theology

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

culture, culture norms, gay, gender norms, heterosexuality, homosexuality, meme, sexuality

I’ve been thinking a lot about gay respectability lately, due to a friend posting a meme in a Facebook group, asking folks to deconstruct it. Here’s the meme:

I think there’s a few things wrong with this, but let’s first give this the most charitable reading possible: “I want to be friends with someone who is pleasant to be with and talk to. I want to know the person behind the presentation.”

I think that’s a fine thing to want. The friends I have are folks with whom I can be vulnerable and they can be vulnerable with me. One friend works out a lot but isn’t some kind of self-absorbed muscle queen. Another friend is very introverted but isn’t self-absorbed.

Continue reading →

National Coming Out Day, 2018

11 Thursday Oct 2018

Posted by David L. Gill in Christianity, Personal

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

coming out, homosexuality, sexuality

I grew up in a home where anything related to coming out was met with a sneer. “Why do they have to force their sexual depravity on us?” was a common refrain in discussions. From the time that I began actually dealing with the fact that my sexual attractions and my experience of the world just didn’t fit the narrative which my friends and relatives seemed all-too-comfortable in, I weighed the options of coming out.

For years, I refused. My freshman year of college, I was asked point-blank by a friend in marching band: “Are you gay?” I told him no. I had reasons, of course. Being a conservative Christian, I wasn’t actually gay because I wasn’t sleeping with men. I was same-sex attracted and was attempting to be free from the curse thereof through prayer, accountability, and just plain perseverance.

There is nothing at all wrong with any of those three things. It was, for me, a misguided attempt to grapple with reality as I found it.

Continue reading →

Friendship and Love

04 Saturday Jun 2016

Posted by David L. Gill in Personal

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

best friend, emotions, experience, friends, friendship, homosexuality, relationships, sexuality

I graduated from seminary in May, 2015, but I still live in town. I keep up with seminary friends who are still in classes, so a group of us get together regularly at a local dive bar for cheap beer and toasted ravioli. (If you’ve not heard of it before, it’s deep fried, breaded ravioli. Marvelous stuff. It’s a St. Louis thing.)

One of my friends told me about a guy who was going to come to the bar to hang out with the group. “He’s in his early 30s, gay, celibate, and a Christian,” said my friend. I have to admit that I thought, “Early 30s and celibate? He’s probably awkward and ugly.” Continue reading →

A Consideration of Struggle

15 Saturday Nov 2014

Posted by David L. Gill in Christianity, Personal, Theology

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

emotions, experience, friendship, Gospel, homosexuality, loneliness, Romans, Scripture, sexual sin, sexuality, sin, temptation, witnessing

A couple of days ago, one of my classmates sent me a PM through Twitter, asking me my thoughts about Andrew Wilson’s recent piece for ThinkTheology. We PMed back and forth on the subject, but as I was at work (sorry, boss), I couldn’t think it through as it deserved. Now seemed like a good time.

Continue reading →

Can the Gay be a Good?

23 Thursday Oct 2014

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

experience, heterosexuality, homosexuality, Orientation, relationships, sexuality

Can the Gay be a Good?

This is a fabulous post by someone I’ve been acquainted with for almost seven years. She gives voice to things I’ve felt for a long time.

← Older posts

Search My Blog

Archive

Gay and Evangelical

RSS Feed RSS - Posts

RSS Feed RSS - Comments

Top Posts

  • Jesus Likes Me, This I Know
  • National Coming Out Day, 2020
  • Scripture & Prayer, 20200211
  • Scripture & Prayer, 20200128
  • Bible Study #1: 1 Peter 1
  • Scripture & Prayer, 20200121
  • St. Aelred Liturgy 2020
  • Gay Celibacy and Relational Capital
  • A Fulfilled Life
  • Gay Exhaustion

Topics I Discuss

assurance of pardon best friend books Bryan Chapell C. F. W. Walther C. H. Spurgeon Calvinism celibacy Christianity Christmas church discipline confession conversion culture Dan Savage dating depression despair emotions encouragement experience false teaching family fear friends friendship gay Gay Christians Gospel heterosexuality holiness homosexuality hope hymns insecurity Jesus judgment Law leadership lesbian Liturgy loneliness love Luke Lutheranism Mark marriage Martin Luther ministry mourning music Paul politics prayer preaching psalms Reformed Theology relationships repentance Rod Rosenbladt Romans sanctification science Scripture seminary sexuality sexual sin sin teaching temptation theology Watson witnessing work worship

Website Powered by WordPress.com.

  • Follow Following
    • Gay and Evangelical
    • Join 189 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Gay and Evangelical
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...
 

You must be logged in to post a comment.