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Gay and Evangelical

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Gay and Evangelical

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Bible Study #1: 1 Peter 1

26 Sunday Jan 2020

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

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bible study, Liturgy

Call to Prayer

James 5:13-16, ESV

Is anyone among you suffering?
Let him pray.
Is anyone cheerful?
Let him sing praise.
Is anyone among you sick?
Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.
And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up.
And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven.
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. 
The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

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A Fulfilled Life

29 Saturday Jun 2019

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

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Tags

celibacy, ethics, homosexuality, love

“The task we have to face is the same, whether we are married or single: To live a fulfilled life in spite of many unfulfilled desires.” —Walter Trobisch

Recently, I finished reading the book Loves Me, Loves Me Not: The Ethics of Unrequited Love, by Dr. Laura A. Smit (Baker, 2005). She is giving me a lot to chew on as I think about my own journey of crushes, love, loss, and friendship.

One section which stands out to me addresses whether to tell someone you love them. Dr. Smit says:

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Gay Exhaustion

01 Friday Feb 2019

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

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Tags

Church, exhaustion, gay, Gay Christians, homosexuality

Folks often ask me how I’m doing. It’s a safe way of starting a conversation that won’t stall out in small talk about the weather or degenerate into a shouting match about politics.

More often than not, I tell people that I’m tired. There are multiple reasons I’m tired these days. Anxiety causes sleep to be inferior. Also, anyone with as many friendships as I find myself having has a lot of relational strain to deal with because people are people and I’m me. If you know me in person and we haven’t had it out yet, relax. We will.

The type of tired I’m thinking about today is “gay exhaustion.” This is something I find working in tandem with all the other anxiety in my life. Here’s what I think it looks like:

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Romance and Friendships

07 Monday Aug 2017

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

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A couple of years ago, I was out with a friend from another town. We ate at a sit-down burger & soda place within walking distance of my house and had a nice long chat. It’s been long enough now that I don’t recall the exact subject of the conversation, but I remember the broad swath of the territory covered. This guy and I have been friends since college and know each other super well. I was in his wedding and if I were ever in the position to be married, he’d be in mine.

At a certain point in the conversation, I made a comment which I had spent a great deal of time deciding how to phrase because, knowing him, I knew the push-back was coming. Push-back, he did…for 35 minutes. After debating whether or not my critique (no, the first sentence of my critique!) was valid, he acquiesced.

But then he said, “See? Why can’t my wife have a perfectly rational conversation like this? You and I can!”

And I looked at him and said, “If I had to sleep next to you, I’d have gotten up and walked out long ago. We can talk this way because I don’t have sex with you.”

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That Deathly Silence

15 Friday Apr 2016

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A powerful post commemorating this year’s Day of Silence. Will you speak for those who can’t?

Spiritual Friendship

There is a fairly famous quote by cartoonist Lynn Johnston that goes, “The most profound statements are often said in silence.” Silence can be a powerful force. Failure to speak can be a form of speaking.

Today is the Day of Silence, a day where many around the country decide to refrain from speaking in order to stand against bullying of LGBT youth. The event originates with the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network (GLSEN). As our cofounder Ron Belgau said in his post on last year’s Day of Silence, “On most questions related to sexuality, we hold positions very different from theirs. It is unlikely that they would endorse our approach, and we do not endorse theirs.” However, despite our disagreements, we do share a common concern for bullying. And days like today present us with wonderful opportunities to speak Christian compassion and love into the cultural issues…

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Can Vows Change Friendships? And Should They?

21 Tuesday Jul 2015

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Wonderful thoughts from Wesley Hill on the pitfalls and possibilities of friendship.

Spiritual Friendship

Sam Allberry (whose own story of being a Christian and coming to terms with his same-sex attraction you can watch here) has written a sharp, charitable take on my new book Spiritual Friendship, and I’m grateful to him for it. While I don’t want to turn this blog into a platform for promoting my books, I do think, in this particular case, reflecting on what Sam says may help all of us grapple more deeply with what we’re trying to accomplish on this blog.

Sam says a lot of kind things about the book, but here is his primary substantive criticism:

[Hill] exhorts us to reconsider the place of covenanted friendships in the life of the church. No one can deny what earlier Christian generations can teach us about friendship. Nor can we deny that a lack of commitment drives so much of our contemporary loneliness. But it seems to me…

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Hoping for Love

29 Monday Jun 2015

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This is a wonderful reflection on what SCOTUS means for people. Please read it…and read it thoroughly.

Spiritual Friendship

jack-evans-800

My friend Alan Jacobs, a traditional sort of Anglican Christian, wrote this the day after the Obergefell ruling:

Perhaps I am soft on sin, or otherwise deficient in serious Christian formation — actually, it’s certain that I am — but in any case I could not help being moved by many of the scenes yesterday of gay people getting married, even right here in Texas. I hope that many American gays and lesbians choose marriage over promiscuity, and I hope those who marry stay married, and flourish.

I know what he’s saying. I felt that too.

But I was thinking more today, What is that experience? For those of us like me who hold to a Christian view of marriage that contradicts the SCOTUS definition, what does it mean to be moved by scenes of gay marriage?

Well, for starters—and I’m speaking for myself here, not necessarily for Alan—I…

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Coming Out Again

26 Wednesday Nov 2014

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Wesley has a wonderful point about being known in ever-deepening ways.

Spiritual Friendship

Earlier this week I was talking briefly online with a friend who’s still in the middle of the process of coming out to family and friends. It’s been a few years since I was in his shoes, and hearing him describe both the newfound freedom and the emotional exhaustion of coming out took me back to those moments of my own life.

I think, for instance, of sitting with a friend at her kitchen table late one night. I’d come upstairs from my basement apartment to where she and her husband lived on the third floor of the house, having decided this would be the night I confided in her, dear friend that she was. And even though I counted on it going well, and even though I’d had the same conversation with other friends a half dozen times in the previous weeks, I still felt jittery. Imagine knowing you…

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Gay Is Not The Scandal, Celibacy Is

13 Thursday Nov 2014

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Why use the term “gay”?

Spiritual Friendship

I’m sure the last thing that most of us want to read is yet another pontification on the term “gay”. Hear me out.

In his book, Redemption Accomplished and Applied, the great Reformed theologian John Murray makes a helpful observation that sheds some light on our modern discussion of LGBT terminology. Discussing the Calvinist teaching of Limited Atonement, he asks whether or not the title of the doctrine is a fair representation of the content. He concludes, “But it is not the term used that is important; it is that which it denotes.”

I bring this up, not to discuss controversial doctrines, but because John Murray has unintentionally put his finger on one of the main issues in the gay debate. It seems that one of the questions of perennial interest in this conversation about sexuality is, “What does the term ‘gay’ denote?” Does it denote a particular behavior…

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Gay In Christ: Day 1 Reflections

01 Saturday Nov 2014

Posted by David L. Gill in Uncategorized

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Today will be Day 2 of 2 for the Roman Catholic conference Gay In Christ: Dimensions in Fidelity. I’m in attendance with several of my friends from the Spiritual Friendship blog: Ron Belgau, Wesley Hill, Kyle Keating, and Gregg Webb. I got to meet Matt Jones for the first time which has been a real treat. I also spent a lovely evening catching up with Chris Damian (whom I’d met before), talking with Melinda Selmys, and meeting Eve Tushnet for the first time.

Touchdown Jesus approves of this conference.

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